Monday, June 29, 2015

Detention

I can't believe I am sitting here at my desk after school when everyone else is either outside playing or inside petting their cats 

because 

Ms. Harrison gave me a detention when it wasn't even my fault or more accurately it was my fault but it wasn't only my fault and it definitely wasn't my idea 

because 

really do I look smart enough to come up with a detailed and overly complex idea like that or dumb enough to get caught carrying out an idea of someone else's knowing that I may get caught 

because 

the others would have to know that I would "spill the beans" the first chance I got and not the actual beans this time like last week during arts and crafts when I for all intents and purposes ruined the class project which involved gluing dried beans on construction paper to make farm animals 

because

our teacher believes in appreciating farm animals by attaching beans and other food stuff to paper with glue as well as honouring and in her case owning farm animals even though she lives in a condo

because

in her words everything can be a farm although my parents said she must be speaking sarcastically or has finally gone off her rocker even though I tell them she keeps telling me she doesn't own a rocker and wishes I would stop asking

because

according to her I "like the sound of my own voice" and "never met a question I didn't like" and "should consider limiting my exposure to glue for a while"

because

we should consider ourselves so lucky to have a seemingly never-ending supply of glue unlike some impoverished children in some far away land whose parents have to leave early in the morning to slave away day and night in some factory 

because

they must put glue on the table each evening although there is always the chance that the glue is mistaken for the white pasty food that is a delicacy in the area and that I should keep that in mind next time I'm thinking of misbehaving

because

she believes I am a good kid who just needs to think before I act and not try to impress the others.

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