The Exchange

"Sorry I'm late. Do you have the stuff?"

"Of course I have the stuff! Who do you think you're dealing with? I am that guy! The guy who brings the stuff! If I didn't have it, then I wouldn't be that guy. I am always bringing things places. Am I making myself clear?"

"Alright. Alright. I got it. I'm just nervous, that's all and hungry and a little bit tired as I didn't sleep well last night. So....where is it? In your jacket? Stuffed up your pant leg? Hidden under that trash can over there? Where is it? I gotta have it!"

"What do you think this is, a movie? In good time, my friend. I'll produce the stuff from its secret spot when the time is right and not a second before or after. I am that precise. All the time."

"Look, I appreciate precision as much as the next guy, but it's cold out. I'm shivering. I'm freezing. It's late and it's windy and I'm tired. I also need to call Darrell or else he gets all suspicious and weird and I don't like it when he gets weird. The suspicion I can handle, but the weirdness really creeps me out. Do you think you could hurry up?"

"No."

"Please. You don't understand how badly I need what you say you have. I'll pay you double."

"Why do you want it so badly? Not that it's my business. You can go spending your money on anything you want, but why this? Why now? Why here? Why not over there a few steps? I've gotten stuff, different things, for so many guys. Guys like you and also guys quite different from you...hairier and with muscles. But never this. Look, you've never told me the reasons and you don't have to, but I'm just wondering why risk so much for something so...odd?"

"Good questions. Very good, in fact. I did make a list, but I left it at home and I don't remember half of it. Actually, I'm kidding with you about actually making a list - it was more of a mental exercise. All I can tell you is it is the final piece of the puzzle and I am not being euphemistic right now, although I may start any moment. It is going to help me and my team finish our project and move towards the next phase."

"You've lost me. I have no idea what puzzle or project or team you are working on or with, and although I love puzzles and projects and teams most of the time, it sounds like you are up to no good and I don't want any part of that."

"Ha! You? Steering clear of things that may be perceived as no good? Ha! That's right, you heard me, I actually did laugh out loud over that. What happened to you? When did you go soft?"

"Soft? Are you calling me soft? Like did I really hear sounds leave your lips after travelling up your throat that somehow formulated the word 'soft'? I think it was last month after Jane left."

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that. Man, I'm sorry. I know that must be hard for you."

"It is. I know I act all tough and cool and hard, but on the inside I have feelings, real feelings and if you dig further down, past those feelings, I am soft. So are you. We all are. And right now, I just can't stop thinking about her, especially when it rains."

"When it rains?"

"Yeah, when it rains. We met on a rainy Monday. Five years ago, although she always claimed it was 7. It was sunny the day before and the weather forecast was for cloudy skies, but it rained which bothered me, as how hard can it be to get the weather right? Really, I have no idea how hard that is.
Anyways, I was working and didn't think to bring my umbrella and then I saw her, and was initially not interested as I was solely focused on needing an umbrella. She was in the wrong place at the wrong time and stood out sort of like a sore thumb, but not really. I literally bumped into her and then she was in the right place at the right time. Funny how quickly that can change sometimes. I still remember her, with that ridiculous sweater she was wearing and that hair. Her hair was wet and hanging down on her shoulders, most likely covering them, but I couldn't be sure as all I could see was hair. And the hair was dripping all over her back and I just fell for her seeing her like that, with a wet back covered with a ridiculous sweater. And now she is gone. Poof. She actually said that when she left. Poof. Can you believe it?"

"That's rough. You know, you could always call if you needed someone to talk to or just hang out with, although that would be better in person as long periods of silence on the phone are awkward."

"Sorry, what? Just because I told you what could be misconstrued as a sob story, even though I wasn't, for the record, sobbing, don't forget who you are dealing with! I can be your worst nightmare or your best friend, or occasionally a little bit of both, just to keep you on your toes. I don't need your sympathy and I don't want your sympathy and I don't even fully understand the whole difference between sympathy and empathy and pity, but I don't have time to get into that right now with you as I am on the clock, not literally of course."

"Okay, okay, okay. Don't shoot me for trying to help and while you are at, please don't shoot me for any reason at all. Just give me my stuff I came for and I'll be on my way,"

"Sorry. I'm just a bit touchy and can't get caught out here with you. I appreciate your kind words and don't mind the other words as well. My ears need the work. Here, let me get your stuff. It is cold and late and I should get home, as should you, just to your home, in case that was unclear. We don't live in the same home. Sorry if I talked your ear off, it's just that I really miss Jane on rainy Mondays, as well as the other days regardless of the weather which makes the rainy Monday aspect a little unnecessary to mention, but it helps me remember the good times."

"It's all good. Thanks for this. I can't believe you procured this so quickly and so easily and without arousing suspicion. This is exactly what I wanted and the guys will be so excited. Here is the cash. I also threw in something extra to sweeten the deal. You like nougat, I hope. Don't worry - your identity is safe with me. I'll never tell anyone. Take care. I'll be in touch if I need anything else and I meant what I said - call me."

"Thanks. I won't. I hope you understand. It is best that we keep things like this. You call when you need stuff. I get the stuff. We meet and exchange said stuff for money. I occasionally tell a vaguely personal story. You try to offer your support. I refuse and summarize the evening as I am right now and then we leave. Good night."

"Good night."