The last of the rice has been eaten. I sit there at the table, looking mournfully at my now empty plate before slowly turning to focus on the jar that once held rice in my dry pantry that is also painfully empty and then I focus on the recycling bin where the once proud plastic bag that carried the youthful, freshly-harvest rice home now resides. I am pleasantly full of rice and yet I yearn for more and more and more. I stand with a determination that I usually reserve for pasta and I walk confidently with a confidence that I usually reserve for bread and I drive to the store with a focus that I usually reserve for driving as driving unfocused can be very dangerous and I buy some more rice because that is what I want to buy. Any questions?
Living without perspective is quite dizzying and with a fair number of scary moments where I just about lose my balance or bump into objects I thought were considerably closer to the horizon but, aside from that, it is totally awesome! Take that perspective!
The purchasing of socks brings me a joy that is mainly indescribable and that is probably good after I spent a lot of time in my formative years writing short pieces of creative non-fiction about buying belts.
After attempting to live rurally and not concern myself with worldly possessions I've given in to my natural tendencies and decided to go to town.
After attempting to live rurally and not concern myself with worldly possessions I've given in to my natural tendencies and decided to go to town.
At points in my life I've wanted to burn fat like crazy but I'm already doing too many other activities like crazy and people are starting to talk...those are actual people talking, right?
There is nothing I like eating better than peanut butter and raspberry jam on perfectly toasted bread. The only thing I insist on is randomly sliced bread with a wide variety of thickness and shapes as I just don't like uniformity in bread slices, and I hope I never give in to the pressure put on us by the bread companies to conform.
Moving forward, I would like to experience as many things in my life as indirectly as possible.
If given the choice between living satirically, rhetorically or allegorically, I would hesitate to choose without first consulting learned citizens throughout my community: doctors, religious figures, professors of philosophy, and sanitation workers, as well as finally going out and spending the $10 to get a much-needed massage as I'd like to be relaxed as possible when I finally make my choice.
Much of the time I like being organized and planning ahead, but then there are those days when I wake up with a twinkle in my eye and, after a quick visit to the drop-in clinic to have my eye checked out, I like doing things on a whim and overemphasizing the "wh" in whim to each passerby I encounter.
I am getting quite bored of being so opaque and after months of practice I am aiming for transparence but would gladly settle on the occasional bout of translucence. Too much transparency and I'll be missing the halcyon days of opaqueness gone by.
If given the choice between living satirically, rhetorically or allegorically, I would hesitate to choose without first consulting learned citizens throughout my community: doctors, religious figures, professors of philosophy, and sanitation workers, as well as finally going out and spending the $10 to get a much-needed massage as I'd like to be relaxed as possible when I finally make my choice.
Much of the time I like being organized and planning ahead, but then there are those days when I wake up with a twinkle in my eye and, after a quick visit to the drop-in clinic to have my eye checked out, I like doing things on a whim and overemphasizing the "wh" in whim to each passerby I encounter.
I am getting quite bored of being so opaque and after months of practice I am aiming for transparence but would gladly settle on the occasional bout of translucence. Too much transparency and I'll be missing the halcyon days of opaqueness gone by.
I, for one, am very glad that my prized and uncounted collection of jelly beans aren't any closer to becoming sentient, counting themselves, and demanding reparations.
People have been praising me recently for being so charmingly inept, but I know at some point the jig will be up and I'll either have to find another way to be charming or to just settle on plain old ineptitude just like my cousin.
If there is a way to be energetically lazy then I plan to eventually roll off the couch and drag my bag of bones out of the house to very slowly find it. For those that don't know me well, there is no actual bag of bones, as I have switched over to using solely boxes earlier this year.
I have just spent the afternoon pouring salt into my wound and I must be doing it wrong as it is pretty okay compared to most other salt-pouring-related activities.
I am eating a great jicama slaw right now. In other news, I have now finished my slaw and am ready for the fish tacos. If you stick around, I'll continue to keep you apprised of all of my other eating experiences as well as they happen.
I have just spent the afternoon pouring salt into my wound and I must be doing it wrong as it is pretty okay compared to most other salt-pouring-related activities.
I am eating a great jicama slaw right now. In other news, I have now finished my slaw and am ready for the fish tacos. If you stick around, I'll continue to keep you apprised of all of my other eating experiences as well as they happen.
Little children are just so cute and adorable and amazing...kind of makes me sick after a while. Maybe I should stop spinning around at some point as I am told that I am supposed to not only be a role model, but I should also be teaching these kids.
My eyes drip tears when I cry and my nose drips liquid when I am sick, but nothing makes my mouth water like the smell of chocolate chip cookies fresh from the oven and nothing, and I mean nothing, makes my ears water ever.
Black and white stripes of paper are carefully cut by sharp scissors and then arranged, delicately, in a mesmerizing, overlapping pattern. Next perfect circles in all of the colours of the rainbow are created, followed by a bountiful of hearts in assorted sizes and shades of red. Outside the window, the world is happening - people fall in and out of love and back in again only with his brother this time; dogs chase cats who chase mice who only wish to live; many of the most important ideas remain comprehendible to but a small group of elite monks living far away in the mountains of a mostly unpronounceable country; atoms crash into each other at dizzyingly high speeds and then do it again and again because that is what atoms do after they sign the contract even if they don't read the fine print; and I just wake up every morning, cut my sideburns that continue to invade the domain of my beard and I find my seat by the window, turn out the lights and then cut pieces of construction paper with my prized pair of scissors.
Just once I'd love to wake up completely surrounded by pigs.
My eyes drip tears when I cry and my nose drips liquid when I am sick, but nothing makes my mouth water like the smell of chocolate chip cookies fresh from the oven and nothing, and I mean nothing, makes my ears water ever.
Black and white stripes of paper are carefully cut by sharp scissors and then arranged, delicately, in a mesmerizing, overlapping pattern. Next perfect circles in all of the colours of the rainbow are created, followed by a bountiful of hearts in assorted sizes and shades of red. Outside the window, the world is happening - people fall in and out of love and back in again only with his brother this time; dogs chase cats who chase mice who only wish to live; many of the most important ideas remain comprehendible to but a small group of elite monks living far away in the mountains of a mostly unpronounceable country; atoms crash into each other at dizzyingly high speeds and then do it again and again because that is what atoms do after they sign the contract even if they don't read the fine print; and I just wake up every morning, cut my sideburns that continue to invade the domain of my beard and I find my seat by the window, turn out the lights and then cut pieces of construction paper with my prized pair of scissors.
Just once I'd love to wake up completely surrounded by pigs.
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